Let Go

I needed a yoga class after my Mt. Yale 14er climb Saturday.  So my friend Heather and her friend Logan said they were taking the 2pm Core Power Yoga class at the Highland studio yesterday.  It was an intro to hot yoga class, which meant the room was a little cooler than the other Core Power classes I'd taken and was perfect for me to stretch, re-center, realign, and find balance.

Sitting in child's pose to start class, the instructor Holly said on the inhale think "let"....and on the exhale think "go."  Two simple words that have significant meaning.  Think about it.  How many times in your life have you just had to let go?  Lord knows I've had to do it over and over and over again.  From letting go of some doozies of boyfriends (good ones too) to letting go of the security of a place you call home to tackle the next adventure in a new town, to saying good-bye and letting go to someone for the last time as they pass on to Heaven, those five simple letters carry so much emotion.

Sometimes it's simple, but more often than not, it's a tough journey.  Workouts are journeys.  Some are fast and furious, some short and sweet, some are attaining a goal, while others are flowing and stir something in your soul. That's what this yoga class did to me.

Ironically, I had let go moments on Saturday during the hike.  As I was hiking Mt Yale and was on the rocky terrain above treeline, slowly working my way to the top, with the changing weather I had a moment of maybe today isn't my day to make 14,000' and I should just let it go. But as soon as I thought that, I saw a friend running back to me who wasn't going to let me hike it alone.  I had to let go and give him my pack - something that was very difficult for this...yes I'll admit....sometimes very stubborn person. Above 14,000' as we were less than 150 feet from the highest point on the summit, I had to let go again.  In a moment of panic and being extremely cold in a snow squall I had to let go and admit my vulnerability, something I'm not exactly the best at doing...okay I'm horrible at it.  I had to admit to myself that I wasn't as tough as I thought I was and rely on the emotional and physical strength of several friends stronger than me in the moment to get me out of a dangerous situation.  You can't reach success if you don't try.  Sometimes you'll fail, sometimes the path and dream changes, and sometime you succeed with flying colors.  Although I was less than 150 feet from my goal of 14,196' I had to change the path because the weather forced me to.  Ironic isn't?

During the class my mind wandered to other moments of letting go - dancing in the rain, singing like no one is around (my Good Day Colorado co-workers will tell you I do that on a very regular basis), to laughing and giggling as my friend Heather and I did during one moment in the class.  Life is full of let go moments.  This class was 60 minutes to let go of whatever was weighing heavy on your mind and heart, sadness, and anything that might be holding you back.  Funny that today when I was running through Whole Foods after my Kinesis and Pilates workout, that I saw a card with this Zen saying: "Leap and the net will appear."

Yes I'm taking note of the signs as I did when my brother and I let go of our dad almost two years ago spreading his ashes out into the wind at Pretty Place, right on the South Carolina-North Carolina line.  As we did, the ashes floated and sailed carried by the wind.  A small change in the breeze brought a little of the ashes back to my brother and I as we stood on the cliff.    My mom said as she watched it - it was my dad giving us one last hug and kiss as we let him go to soar in the beauty of mountains in a place that is like a Heaven on Earth.  There truly is beauty, peace and strength as you let go.

Climbing Mt. Yale...In Sun, Wind, Snow, & Hail

Yesterday I set out to climb my first 14er (peak of 14,000 feet or higher) of the year, my first of the Collegiate Peaks in the Sawatch Range, and my 5th 14er.  There are 54 in Colorado.   This is my short version because I'm doing a longer version of the hike for my website Swept Away with Jennifer Broome.  Look for that soon.

According to 14ers.com Yale is 14,196' in elevation.  We were hiking the Southwest Trail that starts at 9,900' elevation.  That means a 9.5 mile round trip hike with a 4,296' elevation change.

The weather was looking iffy but we had a big group of some co-workers and friends and all wanted to give it a go.  So off we went at 7:22am - 14 of us and 3 dogs.  Within the the first 15 minutes our big group split as Amanda (the only other girl), Pete, Josh, and two dogs were hiking at a slower pace.  

That meant I was trying to hang with a group of 10 guys.  There were two 14er first timers in my group.  There were also several very seasoned hikers/climbers:  Chris leading the group, Sean who was the first cancer survivor to summit Everest, Sean's buddy Ryan, and Scott who hikes a lot.  This is my second 14er with Chris (did first 14er of Quandary with him) and third 14er with Scott (did Grays and Torreys with him).  We were going at a pretty good pace up the first big incline that you hit right off the bat, winding through the trees, tromping through snow, traversing logs across streams, and climbing higher and higher with sunshine changing to intermittent light snow showers.

As we started hiking out of the trees, getting above treeline, I started getting behind the guys by a few minutes because I was taking video (of course!).  I felt that if I could keep the guys in sight then I'd be okay.  I caught up to them as they were gearing up with additional winter gear because the wind and snow started picking up.  I'd been fine without gloves to that point but my hands were getting cold so put on my glove liners along with fleece pullover and wind shell.  As I was gearing up at 9:35am, the guys started to hike again.  My friends Jeremy and Jeremy offered to wait but I said go on because they had already been sitting and getting cold.  After gearing up myself and eating a GU packet, I started hiking again but went about 10 minutes and realized I needed my heavier gloves.  

So I trudged along, hoping the guys slow down some so I can catch up, and I got deep conversation with God about please just let me make it and really telling myself if the trail and weather got to treacherous then I would be smart, stop, and wait for the guys to come back down.  That's about the point when I looked up and saw my friend Sean running back to me.  He wanted to make sure I was okay and didn't want me hiking the rocky trail that was getting steeper by myself given the wintry conditions.  It took three times of Sean asking me to take my pack and I finally gave in.  That meant he was carrying mine and his....I justified it in my head that it was okay because he's training to take a group of cancer survivors up Kilimanjaro in July with Cancer Climber Association.  As we climbed another group coming down said we were about 15 minutes behind the group of guys.  As we're hiking I start noticing that my brain is working but as I'm talking either the words just don't come out or it sounded like I'd had a few too many.  That's altitude.  It also affected my stomach and the desire for any food went out the window.  That's definitely not good on a climb.  There were also plenty of moments of feeling like your heart is pumping up in your throat or going to burst as you gasp for air with less and less oxygen.

The guys going for Yale summit.

As Sean and I got to ridge line at 13,900' we had sunshine....but not for long.  

Sean took me around the side to ascend high.  But it meant I had to hug a rock and climb up through a crevasse with nothing but snow covered rocks extending below.  I have a fear of highs and this was incredibly tough for me.  I did it but but as we were making our way higher on the ridge line toward the final summit, the snow squall hit.  At this point, very shaken and extremely cold, I had what I'll just call my freak out on the mountain.  I was literally trembling out of fear and cold.  I made a decision I didn't want to have to make.  I was over 14,000' but with the near whiteout conditions my summit window to go the approximate last 150 feet or little less up had closed.  So Sean and I hiked back just a little bit so I could be in a semi-sheltered spot and he went forward to meet the other guys.  As he started solo, we saw the group getting closer to us.  There was no more waiting, it was time to go down and down in a hurry. 

The guys hiking back from summit in near whiteout conditions.

Smiling in the blowing snow...shortly after my freak out moment. 

My friend Scott helped me down as Sean and his friend Ryan had to get Sean's dog Maya down one area that was a little too sketchy for her.  As we climbed back to about 13,500' feet, we had a small break in the snow.  I took that as moment to re-center and get a Zen moment on a boulder.  We were there no more than 5 minutes before we had to move again as the next squall was moving in.  

As we got back to about 12,500' we saw the other three and two dogs.  They were doing great just going slow.  They were going to try to make an attempt at the top.  As we got back to about 11,200' we had hail - just another weather element to throw into the mix!

In total it took the first group about 9 hours to do the hike with the weather conditions.  For the second group it was even longer.  But finishing it made the challenge worth it.  I'm certainly thankful to have friend to help get me through even in the worst weather conditions.